Every six or eight weeks I receive a visit to my church office from “Roy.” Whenever he comes there is a quiet understanding between him and me: he needs cash and I am the cash giver. However, this time he just sat and asked how I had been keeping. He also wanted to show me his new boots that he had received from the kindness of the Scott Mission—Roy said, “Yeah, the guy took me to a discount shoe store and told me to grab whatever I needed so I chose these black, warm working boots—they are so great!”

Eventually, after a rambling conversation I jumped to the point and asked, “What’s up Roy? How can I help?” At that point he opened his mouth widely and showed me his teeth. Most of them were missing and those that were left were rotting. Roy said, “I need caps—eating is so difficult because I can’t chew my food!” I looked at his decaying, black covered teeth and pulled a twenty dollar bill out of my wallet. For a new set of caps.

After a bit we hugged and I told him to keep in touch. I told him to look up a friend of mine in London, Ontario who would help him out. He said, “Thanks, I will.” Then he slipped out the side door of the church for another season in the cold, and often unfriendly streets of Toronto.

When Roy left I mused on what it would be like to be him. The difficulties of rotting, painful teeth and the challenges of eating, having to constantly navigate my way of life on the street! I don’t think I would do very well. I am too far removed from my hermit great grandfather who lived in Cave Hill just outside of Belfast.

I told myself: be thankful for your teeth, Alan, and your Bolivian dentist Dr. Zarzar! Don’t be an ingrate, Alan. Be truly mindful of life’s/God’s blessings each day. Be compassionate, Alan. Spread it around. Always give the other person the benefit of the doubt. Life is tough and people don’t need judgment from me—only compassion and love.

These are the things I told myself.

Maybe, that is what we all really need—gratitude, compassion and love. At least it is a good start, a good intention, as we bounce our way through a myriad of hurting, bemused individuals in 2012. I’m trying harder. For Roy.